As I was reading this newly found book, "She Calls Me Daddy", that my wife suggested I read, the author Robert Wolgemuth makes a very compelling statement. He states that the greatest challenge for a dad is to "keep from being distracted by the day-to-day stuff... that can easily capture a dad's full-time attention." He goes on to say that you need to keep this fully completed picture of the finished project so that you are not to get lost in the minutia and forget the reason of why you began this project in the first place. Or as the saying goes, you don't want to miss the forest for the trees. Now that I've been a father for eight months, I can understand what he is getting at. He has come to find out that in all the tiny details of a normal day of being a parent, that seems like it can fill two days, that the true joy of being a father is realizing that this itty bitty person is your daughter. She was created for a purpose and a life filled with so many joys and happiness and as the father, I get to mold that. He says that many people can mold her but no one else will ever be her daddy. This role of being a daddy is a gift, every day.
So as I sat there reading this while sitting in my chair, on my patio, I began to think of the process it was to create this paver patio I sit upon. If anyone has ever done a DIY paver patio project, you know the extent of the details it takes to complete. First there's the questions of, what size do I want it to be? What color pavers? What design should make for the lay of the pavers? Then after that's done your next thoughts are, what exactly do I need to do this? What is the estimated cost? time? And after all the purchases, truckloads of sand, and calculations you begin to build the patio. And you do everything by the book. You put down the base of several inches, then the sand, then the leveling and you complete the project and it looks amazing. You've never felt better. Sure this was hard. Harder than expected but you completed it and now you're done. Now you can sit back and relax in this new-found haven. But time goes by - the seasons come, many rainstorms and unrelenting snow come through. One day you walk out onto your patio and you see that some moss is growing in some cracks or a few bricks have shifted and you think man, what happened? Well like Robert states about being a daddy, "doing the right thing with your daughter won't guarantee success, but it will increase your chances."
So I encourage you to not get discouraged because the beautiful result you once had with your project now seems to be changing and slipping a little. You being a DIY-er, probably just like me, started this project because you love working outside and you wanted to enjoy it in your own way. Well you certainly have that. It may not be this pristine paver patio with three levels and was made with such perfection that even after 10 years not a paver has moved. No, you have a patio that was made with your bare hands, your hard work, and your discipline. You have a patio that will last you for years to come and those small imperfections won't take that away from you. So go on and take pride in what you made and sit out on your patio for hours. For do you remember that picture you had in your head when you first dreamed of it? Your seeing it firsthand, you just got to see the forest through the trees...
